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A friend and fellow mentor recently suggested I write a blog on how startup founders should relate to mentors, and vice versa.  She made the suggestion because, in her role as a mentor, she had experienced what she saw as unreasonable expectations, and had been subject to some inappropriate behaviour. 

I was a bit surprised. This should all be pretty obvious, no?  Unfortunately, the obvious is not always obvious. Unfortunately, I suspect that those who bother to read this blog probably need it least.

Some accelerators are very good at formally educating mentors and startup founders as to their respective roles.  Even then, however, problems sometimes arise. 

So at the risk of stating the obvious, here are a few points.

Rule 1: The term “mentor” itself is problematic, but conveys a key point -- mentors should not look for reward

I don’t much like the term “mentor” because it suggests a level of subservience between the mentor and the startup founders that doesn’t accurately describe the relationship.  Mentors really are advisers. The objective is that they provide relevant consulting expertise in subject areas where the startup lacks in-house expertise. 

I guess the main benefit of the term “mentor”, however, is that it conveys a key aspect of the relationship. A mentor is expected to provide free advice without any expectation of return. Mentors need to take this on board – their activity with startups is to help the startups, not secure financial or commercial advantage through their relationships with startups.  Those benefits ultimately may result if the mentorship relationship is successful. However, workshops that sound like marketing pitches (which I have seen more often than one might hope) are inappropriate, and mentors should not be angling to get equity, board seats or other benefits.

Rule 2:  The period of mentorship is not unlimited

Mentors frequently operate in the context of accelerators, incubators, or other similar programs.  While they are expected to “give first” during the period of the program, they should not be expected to continue to provide free advice after its completion.  Some mentors will be happy to do so; others will not (and, indeed, may need to charge for their services in order to eat). Also, even during the term of the program, there may be some services that the mentor is not prepared to offer (or offer for free), perhaps because he or she only provides those services professionally, and for a fee.

Startups shouldn’t take the continued free service of mentors after program-end for granted – if the relationship is of continuing usefulness to the startup, there needs to be a discussion of the terms on which it should continue. This needs to be fair to both sides. Use care to ensure that neither side comes to feel that it is being taken advantage of.

Rule 3: Startups must be open to advice, or they shouldn’t seek mentors

The best CEO’s of large corporations are self-reflective and open. They recognize their strengths and weaknesses, and hire the best people they can, particularly to address areas where they are weaker.  They try to listen to a range of opinions before making decisions. In my experience, it is very dangerous for a CEO to think that he or she knows it all, or to hire people who are “mini-me’s” or are afraid to challenge the CEO’s views in an appropriate way. 

The same is true for startups. There is no point in soliciting guidance if the founders are not prepared to consider it seriously.  This isn’t simply a question of the startup’s relationship with its mentors – for example, the same is true in respect of its relationships with investors and potential investors, and with customers and potential customers. Quite rightly, investors are unlikely to be impressed by a close-minded founder team.  

Rule 4: Mentors are not running the startup

Conversely, mentors are not running the startup – they are advisors. From the standpoint of both the mentor and the startup, there needs to be a clear understanding that the startup’s founders are the decision-makers. 

Mentors need to be careful with the manner in which they coach their advice, and startups need to be careful in the way they deal with it.  Not all advice is good advice, and in any case it is the startup that will live or die based on the decisions of its founders.

In particular, mentors should be careful to classify their advice appropriately. Some advice is largely factual or professional, and the mentor can, and should, show the support for it. Other advice is purely opinion, and needs to be labelled as such. Mentors need to be particularly careful in qualifying their opinions in areas that are not within their core expertise. More generally, mentors need to be modest about the quality of their advice, and accept that it may not be right.

Also, in areas that involve judgment, it is much better if a mentor can, by asking appropriate questions, encourage founders to reassess their own thinking rather than simply set out advice. Done well, this may help the startup to improve its own decision-making processes, and not simply address a specific issue. It also encourages the startup to consult with others. 

Rule 5: both mentors and founders must behave professionally

The relationship between mentors and founders is a business relationship, and both parties need to behave appropriately.

That seems pretty obvious, right? However, my friend advised that she recently was “hit on” by founders of several startups that she had just met and was advising. I was shocked by this, and would be similarly shocked by mentors behaving in the same way with founders.  

Conclusion

Being a mentor is a lot of fun. I learn a lot from advising startups, and find it very rewarding. 

However, both mentors and founders need to understand the nature of their relationship, and behave accordingly.

* * *

This discussion is not intended to provide legal advice, and no legal or business decision should be based on its contents. If you have any questions or comments, feel free to contact [email protected].

You will find a listing of Bob’s weekly startup blogs on US and international expansion and early stage financing here: http://bit.ly/StartupGuidesIndex

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